Gray Blue Azure Sky,
fading into one another like pastels.
Big fluffy clouds like the stain of white paint.
Vanishing point filled by trees,
empty space filled by graying waters.
The froth cascades gently up the waves,
as it crashes onto the craggy heaps of moist moss ridden rocks
Rest your feet on the fragments of sand,
and let the waves wash away your sorrows.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Relax, (Jones Beach Poem)
Posted by Ally F at 9:43 AM
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2 comments:
Hmmm, is a stain fluffy? That's the only line that irked me. But overall it was a good poem. You also forgot to add the bugs.
You do have some poetical sparks in you, but I still think that you are holding back. Overall, a literate person like youself should be writing much meatier pieces.
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